wondering len



My mind now is again in its hyper mode. I’ve been thinking too much lately. Earlier on my way home my mind wanders off again. I realized that in less than four months I’m turning 31; yeah I know spinsterhood is just around the corner. But I don’t give a heck with that.

What is getting into my nerve is that up to this age I still haven’t got enough achievement to boost to. First, I haven’t got my own house. Second, I don’t have car yet and third, I tried to remember how much my savings is, I almost cried. Poor me!

Tsk! But that is all material things, and I am not a materialistic person. It’s nothing. (Did I hear someone booed?)

What I’m really alarmed is that when I try to figure out on what I’m really good at I realized there is none! Surely I know a lot of things. Someone called me before a “jill of all trades”. Now I can add “A master of nothing” to that.

Maybe now is the time to push thru my old goals. I really want to study again, but not another degree!  I think I shall enroll in short courses this year. It is never late for learning anyway.

I just wonder if this is what they call mid-life crisis.


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